Take your time for dreaming--
it’s the path to the stars.
Take your time for thinking--
it’s the spring of clearness.
Take your time for laughing--
it’s the music of the soul.
Take your time for living--
it’s the wealth of life.
Take your time for being kind--
it’s the gate to joy.
--An old Irish Prayer
Ok Edythe, it’s time for you to come back to visit here in Edmonds. Your long vacation is over and it’s time to return to your normal routine. A couple weeks ago was the three-month mark from the day you died. And I hit a wall. I’d had enough of you being gone. I’ve been a good sport about your absence. I’ve kept busy and been productive with my “to do” lists and goals. I’ve written you these blog letters, I’ve noted “kindnesses” and tried to keep a positive attitude. But now it’s enough. I’ve had enough of you being gone.
As I puzzled about my new discontent, I realized that it was the norm for you to be gone for extended trips: to the Republic of Georgia to check on the orphanage and see friends, yearly visits to Ashland for plays, yearly lengthy stays in Kauai, visits to your daughter, Kathy, or exotic cruises. I always knew I could connect with you if needed AND you would always eventually return. Until this time. Once again, I must accept that you have moved on to another realm. Once again, I feel the loss and emptiness.
And once again, an unexpected kindness broke through my gloom. In the process of using my iPhone note pad, I found an entry I have no recollection of recording! It was a heartwarming blessing for life, an old Irish Prayer. As I read the closing lines,
“… Take your time for being kind--
it’s the gate to joy.”
I feel, once again, the warmth of your memory provided comfort.
The Irish Prayer nudged me from despair to a reminder that Kindness would not only be a healing balm for my heart, but also a gate to joy.